While most attention to crowning seasonal pop music champions is focused upon declaring a "Song of the Summer", 2014 has produced an interesting battle for the pop hit which defined the Fall.
In one corner, you have "Shake It Off" by pop veteran (who is 24 years old) Taylor Swift, a song which, for lack of a better phrase, is what it is: It's not a particularly profound song; it's built upon a few hooks and catchy, inane melodies; it's the very epitome of pop music. Some people like this song a lot but nobody is claiming it to be great art--it's a fun diversion.
In the other corner, you have "All About That Bass" by newcomer Meghan Trainor. The 20 year old has, in "All About That Bass", a huge pop hit with her very first single. But unlike Swift, who wrote a pop song, Trainor's song has been praised as something more. I fully expect the song to be nominated for a Grammy and it has a very good chance of winning it. Purported lyrical profundity is a good way to gain kudos.
Here, I am going to break down, line by line, the lyrics to "All About That Bass", since lyrical content is a major reason for its acclaim. I have little to say, really, about the musicality of the song--arguing about whether non-lyrical elements of music sound good seems a bit like arguing whether a person is attractive or not to me. Though don't worry--I have plenty of potshots to go around!
Because you know I'm all about that bass, bout that bass, no treble (Repeat a few times)
First of all, I'm amazed by how many people apparently think she's saying trouble. Are people not familiar with bass and treble? Am I dating myself by observing that as a child, I learned what bass and treble were through an actual, real life stereo? Anyway, I can sort of buy "bass" as an analogy for being larger since "bass" is a heavy sound. It's kind of weird but I THINK I GET IT. But treble? Like, I get that treble is the opposite of bass musically but can you imagine a body being referred to as "treble"? Does that mean it looks like a treble clef? Treble clefs are pretty damn curvy!
Yeah it's pretty clear, I ain't no size two, but I can shake it shake it, like I'm supposed to do
Here is a picture of Meghan Trainor.
Okay, she's probably not a size two. But she's not exactly big. If you knew a girl who looked like Meghan Trainor...wait, why am I being condescending here? You do know a girl who looks like Meghan Trainor. Several. She's a pretty girl who isn't super skinny. The implication that she has faced any kind of serious level of discrimination for her size is ludicrous. I don't tend to read too much into lyrics as a reflection on personal experiences--to steal a sentiment once used by Ice-T, I don't get mad that David Bowie isn't ACTUALLY an astronaut. But if we're going to make this song out to be Trainor's personal rally cry, it's probably worth questioning the validity of it.
And as for the fact that she can shake it shake it like she's supposed to...good for her. Just...cool. I question a little bit that you're supposed to do anything, or that you're under any obligation to do something in particular, but I'm just nitpicking here.
'Cause I got that boom boom that all the boys chase, and all the right junk in all the right places
I want you to remember this line for later. I have nothing to say about it just yet, but I will. OHHHHH, I will.
I see the magazine workin' that Photoshop. We know that shit ain't real. C'mon now, make it stop
In a weird way, this is the point where "All About That Bass" starts to remind me a little bit of "Royals" by Lorde, in the sense that both songs are perfect autumn "message songs". Coming off of the summer songs, which are almost uniformly decadent good time jams, people decide they want a song with some kind of lyrical depth, but in both of these cases, the lyrics reach for some low-hanging fruit. Lorde expressed the pretty safe social critique that having money isn't all that important and Trainor expresses here that the media portrays a disingenuous image of women. Like, they're both right, but who is arguing with them? Now, mind you, I liked "Royals" for reasons aside from the lyrical content (until you heard it five billion times and got sick of it, it was pretty hard to deny that the production was pretty great). I don't quite hear the same accolades for the production of "All About That Bass".
If you got beauty beauty, just raise em up, 'cause every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top
A lovely sentiment. I mean that. Perhaps somewhat trite, but that's okay. But let's revisit that line from before I told you to keep in mind. And now you have a mixed message. In this line, the message is that you're beautiful because of who you are. In the previous line, the message is that if you're not a "size two", you meet a special categorization of beauty because, well, boys like it. Honestly, I think Meghan Trainor was very well-meaning when she wrote the song and that she wanted to write a largely feminist anthem, but that she still felt the need to dip into cliches about empowered sexuality--I don't even mind songs about empowered sexuality, but a message of "It doesn't matter what anybody thinks" is quite different from a message of "Take advantage of what other people think."
Yeah, my mama she told me don't worry about your size
You have a very good mother.
She says boys like a little more booty to hold at night
I question my previous statement. Not that I endorse the conventional parenting wisdom that you should make young girls ashamed of their sexuality, but this seems somewhat extreme on the other end.
You know I won't be no stick figure silicone Barbie doll
Isn't the criticism of Barbie's physique generally less that she's a stick figure and more that she has an incredibly unrealistic bust size? Perhaps Barbie is the one who's all about that bass, Trainor.
So if that's what you're into then go ahead and move along
This line in and of itself is okay. If it weren't for a whole bunch of other lines saying the opposite, this line essentially saying "If you don't like the way I look, then fuck off" would be quite nice.
I'm bringing booty back
THANK GOD! I'm so sick of pop stars like Iggy Azalea and Nicki Minaj and Beyonce who forced "booty" (this sentence feels ridiculous on any level so I'm compromising by putting "booty" in quotes and adding this disclaimer) into a dark corner.
Go ahead and tell them skinny bitches that
I am strongly opposed to discrimination against people because of their size. I have dealt with weight issues almost my entire life and I remain paranoid that if I ever slip up and fall back into unhealthy habits that once had me dangerously overweight, I will quickly undo everything I have done to keep my health under control. I understand that for some people--hell, for most people--their weight is a factor that, while they technically do have some agency in the matter, it can quickly spiral, and that any spiral that occurs is not a reflection on them being any lesser of a person. If a person is overweight, it's usually due to some combination of genetics (which they can't control), diet and inactivity (both of which they can control but what the hell difference is it to you, an independent human being, what he or she does?). So in summation, screw you for discriminating against overweight people.
But it works both ways. And you can't call people "skinny bitches" and expect to be taken seriously if your point is that discrimination is bad. Overweight people can be cool and awesome and vibrant and whatnot but so can skinny people. So much for every inch of you being perfect from the bottom to the top--this rule only applies if you aren't deemed a "skinny bitch."
No I'm just playing, I know you think you're fat, but I'm here to tell you, every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top
As long as you think you're fat. If you're insecure because you don't think you are shapely enough (which isn't exactly an uncommon insecurity), you evidently aren't invited to the party.
In conclusion, this song is lyrically not for me. If you enjoy whitewashed pseudo-doo wop, that's up to you. But as for me, I'll go ahead and move along.
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